September 2007 Archives


Dear Finn

I was watching you sleep today for a little bit and you looked so beautiful. Your skin is like porcelain and you have these wonderful long eyelashes that certainly came from nowhere near my side of the family. Sleeping kids really are quite lovely. Might be something to do with all that silence. All that non-noise. All that non-banging on the keyboard with your toy ambulance. That non-dragging on the screen door with your plastic cup. That non-whingeing about not being allowed to bang on the keyboard or drag on the screen door.

The other day you were rather unwell and rather grumpy with it. You had an enormous midday nap and when you eventually got up it was as if you really didn't want to be awake. One of those days when the only thing that feels good is to creep back into bed and pull the duvet over your head. I well understand. But you were up, and you crawled up into my lap and laid your head on my chest. I stroked your back and your eyes gently closed. You just lay. These times are so few and far between. You're normally a moving squirming ball of seldom you are still.

The way that you are so trusting of me to keep you safe just blows me away. The responsibility seems so enormous, and on a day like today when you are sick, and you need me just that little bit more, I really feel I could move mountains. You have such faith in me, and sometimes I really feel I could meet your expectations.

I know that I will fail you sometimes. I hope it's not often, and I hope it's not for long. In sickness or in health, I will always try my hardest to be there when you need me. And no matter what, I will always be your Mum.


My Little Apple

Dear Finn

A couple of nights ago Ben, a friend of your Dad, rang up lamenting about the woes of renting in Melbourne. Although we had nothing really to compare to his tales of the psychotic woman howling next door in the middle of the night, I did recount that I found it gross to live in a ground floor apartment and hear the people above me pissing in their toilet. Seems like someone having a wee on my head I said. I also mentioned that your Dad didn't find this at all offensive, due to the fact that he is a boy. Ben's take on this was yes, Dad wouldn't worry so much about the pissing thing partly because he is a boy, but also because he is DUTCH and Dutch people are just plain DISGUSTING. No control or shame over the public deliverance of private emissions. In fact a certain pride. Preceded by a certain fanfare. JOY even. I thought this was just a unique (if not loveable, than perhaps liveable) aspect of your Dad. But no, he is DUTCH and therefore quite naturally DISGUSTING. It explains a lot.

Now, you've had a cold recently. Accompanied by coughing, snivelling, fever and in your own words "broken ears". This morning you were digging in your overladen nose, until your finger was covered in a satisfactorily large amount of snot. Snot you said, proudly waving it around. Snot. Snot. You tried to give it to your Dad. He wasn't really interested so he fended you off. Snot you said.

Staring at your snotty finger and staring at your unwilling Dad, you didn't know what to do. So you put your finger in your mouth. Eat snot, you said. Eat snot.

I tried to explain to you that snot was not really to be eaten, that it wasn't really food, accompanied by the ringing tones of your Dad's laughter.

The apple fell a very short distance from the tree.


Catch up

Dear Finn

It's been a while since there was a post written about you. You can thank your sister for that...She Who Is Up All Night makes Mummy's brain hurt...spasm briefly if necessary with coffee and donut infusion and then fall over. Makes post hard to write. But in celebration of your 25 months there's things to be said.

You've started to show a huge interest in the phone. When Mum and Dad are talking, especially to Oma or Grandma, you grab the phone and demand your share of time. You listen intently, with such transfixed awe on your face. Mostly you won't say anything at all, but Oma has the knack of getting you to count somehow. I think she recites One, two buckle my shoe. You point out that the phone is ringing, when the phone is in fact ringing. You bring me my bag when my mobile rings.

You're also starting to show a much greater interest in toileting. We bought an insert for the toilet instead of a potty thinking it might make the transition daycare they don't use potties but have baby toilets so I figure that watching the other kids sit on a toilet will lead to it making more sense for you to, when the time is right. Every now and then you start saying POOS! and then heading into the bathroom to drag out the plastic ring. Despite the fact that it's made for kids, it's still too large for your bony little ass and you look rather silly as you hang onto the sides grimly lest you come to grief. Not that it's any laughing matter of course. A very serious business. The other day you had a wee while perching much cries of jubilation from all big folk. You're beginning to get it.

You're very big on dragging a chair around these days to get you up to the height that you think you should be. This helps with turning lights on and off, loading and unloading the washing machine, locking and unlocking the door and watching Mummy cook.

One of the best ways we have to distract you these days is to park you in front of a Word Document on the pc, with the font set to about 60 and caps lock on and let you poke at the letters and numbers. It's amazing to us really. You recognise and can say all the numbers and most of the letters. Sometimes you are so clever.

Other times you're just a big pain in the ass. I'm allowed to say this as Brad Pitt said it about his kids - my ultimate permission slip. Please Brad, come and give me some parenting advice...just leave your woman at home. Ha.

You know about MINE now and have no hesitation in using it, when any of your friends come over and try and use your toys. You're all about INSTANT SATISFACTION which becomes harder and harder when Miss H is yelling in my ear for a feed and you're demanding that I read a story or play duplo. You want UP! now and DOWN! shortly after. You are NO OKAY when offered food, shortly followed by SCREAMING when it is cleared away. The list of things that you find VERY ANNOYING is long and complicated. You are CONTRARY.

You are also, endlessly and always: